Qui-Gon Jinn's Journal
_____
orginally posted at Bridget's LJ
_____
Day One
Still dead.
Day Two
Yup, still dead. Am quite bored. Being dead sucks. Have to find some way to amuse self.
Day Three
Paid a ghostly visit to former apprentice. Seems to be doing quite well. But what is with the beard? If it’s some sort of salute to me, I’m touched, but he should check himself in a mirror to make sure there are no crumbs in the beard. Wait…
Day Four
Found old pictures of me. Have had crumbs in beard for decades… and no one told me! Am getting close to having had it.
Day Five
Listened in to Yoda and Mace talking. So the dark side is clouding everything is it? Well, maybe if you two had listened to me about there being a fricken Sith Lord out there I might not be dead and bored to death… Wait… Am dead! Am dead and no one told me about crumbs! Will swear revenge.
Day Six
Am quite miffed that I am dead. Stupid little green booger man. Remember how he smarted off to me acting like he was all badass and what not. Have hidden his cane! Ha!
Day Seven
Little green booger man still can’t find cane! Ha!
Day Eight
Listened in to Mace while he was singing in the shower. ‘Jedi master that's a sex machine to all the chicks?’ Yeah right. He needs to get laid but he won’t! Have slipped his little black book into Jar Jar’s room.
Day Nine
Have found out that former Master has turned to the dark side. As far as mid life crisis’s go, this is just a little bit extreme. Am slightly miffed that my foxy genes were not used for army. Woulda been cool to see thousands of sexy me’s kicking ass.
Day Ten
Have also found out that Palpatine is a Sith Lord. Stupid little… Thinks he’s such a badass with his swivelly chair! Have taken all of his underwear and put it in freezer. Then covered his robe in mustard. Trying acting all scary and spooky now!
Day Eleven
Have followed Chosen One to Tatooine. Apparently I have taught the boy nothing. Anger bad, but getting felt up by hot senator very cool. Shoved prissy protocol droid into ship with them. Am curious to see just how many curse words astromech droid knows.
Day Twelve
Wow. Have never heard a droid cuss like that!
Day Thirteen
Apprentice has got himself captured. Suspect he was trailing bounty hunter on a mission for snuggles and not because the Council told him.
Day Fourteen
Now apprentice and apprentice’s girlfriend have gotten themselves captured. These people know nothing of stealth. Have found stupid Neimoidian as being responsible for attacks on Padme. Why he wants to kill her, I don’t know. She’s so cute. Suspect he is jealous that she is more interested in foxy Chosen One’s lightsaber.
Day Fifteen
Got bored so hid Dooku’s donuts in Gunray’s room. Ha ha! Was amused to see Force Wedgies given to Neimodians.
Day Sixteen
Jedi Order finally got up off their collective asses and came to rescue apprentice, apprentice’s apprentice, and apprentice's apprentice's girlfriend. Former Master was not content with own donuts and had to go and swipe Yoda’s. That was a mistake. No one takes Yoda’s donuts. Dimly recall having taken a donut as a padawan and found self dangling at the top of tower by underwear. Was not surprised to see Dorku, I mean Dooku get the snot kicked out of him.
Day Seventeen
Watched with amusement that apprentice and Yoda actually thought Anakin was escorting Padme back to Naboo. If the Council is that dim, the Jedi are doomed.
______
| Index |
| Home |