The Secret Journal of Pyro
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orginally posted at Bri's LJ
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Day One
Am bored. The life of a goody two shoes is very boring. Would like the faced paced life of a spandex wearing bad-ass, but alas... Spandex has become passe. Damn.
Day Two
Am going to overhyped school trip to museum place. Should prove to be more boring, but at least there is overpriced bagels in the cafeteria. I sure hope no really meaningful lesson applicable to real life events pop up. Those things never go well. Specially for Southern belles.
Day Three
Trip sucked. As suspected some sort of important lesson was learned, but was distracted by teaching punk ass youths the dangers of smoking. As usual, Bobby was a huge freaking show off. Jerk already has girlfriend, no need to be so overly dramatic. Then of course the professor has to top everyone with the freezing the whole room thing. As if that would impress any... Okay fine, it was cool.
Day Four
Pissed off Rogue good today. Rogue did not get clever teasing joke I made. I pointed out in every group of three, one was the smart one, one was the cute one, and one was the ho. She thought I meant her when I thought it was very apparent the third was Bobby.
Day Five
Why can't spandex be in?
Day Six
Wolverine back in town. Rogue is acting all with the eye lash batting. Cyclops is all with the whining about his bike. Bobby is acting all with the possessive weirdo boyfriend thing. Not so sure why he is acting so whiny. It's not like Marie would be swooning over his wacky haircut, mysterious air, rippling muscles, devil-may-care attitude. Shit. Even I'm turned on.
Day Seven
School was invaded by secret military commando jerkfaces. Totally interrupted my internet spandex chat, the inconsiderate bastards. Was further angered when Wolvie had to get all macho with the not letting me drive and the hotwiring a running gag. I get no respect.
Day Eight.
Am horrified. Have discovered Bobby is a yuppie. Hate yuppies.
Day Nine
Still get no respect. Was trying to be all mighty with the avenging of Wolverine's supposed death with my mighty super flame thrower effect when Rogue had to literally steal my thunder. Then Storm and Jean had to get all calvary like. Will no one let me open up the can of whoop ass? Come on!
Later
Rogue was sucked out of jet. Maybe next time she will pay more attention when the 'fasten seat belts' light come on. Was saved by overly religious super smurf.
Day Ten
Met very cool Darth Vader type. Pointed out to me that leather is way hipper than spandex and lasts longer. Proceeded to call me a god among insects. Also think perhaps hot female Smurf type wants me. On further introspection, wonder if perhaps older guy was hitting on me. Figures. Am damn near irresistable.
Day Eleven
Dammit, have to wait in the jet with all the other kids. Still am not given the chance I deserve to open up can of whoop ass. I really, really want to. Also, am so getting tired of this whole untouchable romance crap between these two. Honestly, they should just pick up some Saran Wrap and have at it already for Pete's sake.
Day Twelve
Got sick and bored of being stuck with the wimpy wanting whiners. Decided to join old dude and the hot smurf in quest to open up can of whoop ass on human population. Have been promised bitchin leather type outfit to do ass kicking in and a bagel with strawberry cream cheese. Whoo hoo!
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